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HomeShopProfessor Painindaass’s Sphincter Shrinker ...
“Heartbreaking Dawn’s Cauterizer Hot Sauce” has been added to your cart. View cart

Professor Painindaass’s Sphincter Shrinker Hot Sauce

$ 9.99

Sphincter Shrinker Hot Sauce is brought to us by Professor Payne Indeass, at least according to the label! With a heat rating of six out of ten, this is definitely a mighty sauce.

In stock

SKU: 236048 Categories: Extract Sauces, Heat Rating - 8 Tag: extract, Hot Sauce, Sphincter Shrinker, Sphincter Shrinker Hot Sauce
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Product Description

Sphincter Shrinker Hot Sauce is brought to us by Professor Payne Indeass, at least according to the label! With a heat rating of six out of ten, this is definitely a mighty sauce.

You might think that just because applesauce is the first ingredient in Sphincter Shrinker Hot Sauce, it’s not going to burn you. You’d be wrong. The interesting thing about this sauce is that the flavor progresses. At first bite you taste applesauce, and you think you’ve been gypped- this isn’t hot at all! Then you taste raisins, and with a raised eyebrow you look back at the bottle… Nice, but no spice yet. Next, the sweet smokiness of the curry hits you, and you start to wonder what the devil this sauce is up to. About this time, the heat starts catching up with you… why are you crying for your mommy?

The funny thing about the name “Sphincter Shrinker” is that it’s actually a good way of describing your body’s reaction to a sauce this hot. Anyone who’s ever served in the military knows about what we call “the pucker factor.” When you are about to do something thrilling (read: dangerous) your sphincter shrinks. So, for instance, jumping out of airplanes has a seriously high pucker factor- if you haven’t done it, trust me on this one!

Now, maybe this hot sauce doesn’t have quite as high a pucker factor as jumping out of airplanes, but it’s pretty frickin hot!

Use a drop of this in apple cobbler, pumpkin pie, or spice cake, or add a tiny bit to oven roasted sweet potatoes, pork chops, or leg of lamb. Spice up curry in a hurry with Sphincter Shrinker! Dip honey roasted peanuts in it, or try this as an addition to cider donuts. Awesome. Of course, don’t miss the opportunity to enjoy an ice-cold beer with this one, no matter how you choose to use it!

Sphincter Shrinker Hot Sauce is a Peppers of Key West fave- check it out!

Additional information

Weight 13 oz
Dimensions 12 × 3 × 3 in
availability

Usually Ships in 24 to 48 Hours

productcondition

New

Ingredients:

Apple Sauce (Apple, Sugar, Vitamin C (Asorbic Acid, Citric Acid), Distilled Vinegar, Water, Raisins, Spices, Balsamic Vinegar, Apple Juice, Chile Extract, Xanthan Gum

Nutritional Facts:

Unavailable

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Only logged in customers who have purchased this product may leave a review.

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